So it is January, the month of New Year’s resolutions and all that jazz.
I struggled very much last year to keep up my blog. I started to write a blog post in Autumn about struggling to keep up my blog and didn’t even get round to publishing that. I bet it is still sitting in my drafts. My drafts being symbolic of my constantly whirring brain with way too many loose ends left untied.
Do any of you struggle with finding time? I have so much content in my brain, in notebooks, on my laptop and I am constantly discovering things I would love to document, however I struggle to find the time to put it down on paper/on my laptop. I am bursting at the seams with content which is something I can imagine some bloggers crave for. So what is my issue?
I think I need a ‘Me’ Manager. I procrastinate. Sometimes I just want to sleep on my day off. Sometimes I just want to rest after my shift at work. All the time I feel guilty for not being able to find the time or the motivation to write.
I beat myself up particularly at this time of year for a few reasons. Firstly, I work in cheese. For those of you who do not know, Christmas is synonymous with Cheese. In cheesemongering and wholesaling we do a colossal percentage of our yearly sales in the last two months of the year. This means lots of work, longer hours, long days and extra projects as well as retailing to crowds of apparently cheese-starved zombies who need to buy ALL the cheese for their Christmas and New Year. I LOVE it. It is busy and exciting however it is absolutely draining and there is no way I even try to do any writing assignments or personal projects in December. Even keeping up posting on Instagram is tough. Christmas and New Year passes and I remember how to breathe again for a few short moments while people all turn vegan and diet for a couple of weeks and I beat myself up. I beat myself up because I have the time now. I beat myself up because I am not working 14 hour days anymore and can stay awake for longer than half an hour when I get home. I beat myself up because I look back at the last couple of months and see just how little I have managed to do for ME.
I am affected quite badly by the darkness in Winter. S.A.D. or whatever you call it. I get particularly bad at the beginning of November and early January. November, when the days are visibly shorter and January once I have resurfaced from being a cheese robot and I finally have time to think again. This is when I beat myself up as I now have plenty of time, more time than ever in fact, but I just cannot motivate myself to do anything. The sun goes down and that’s it, I am useless for the evening. I may as well go to bed at 4pm. I stare at the walls, I sit on the sofa. Pick up a book? What? I can just about feed myself (at the minute it is mainly Sam feeding me) and have long baths. That is it.
How do you all motivate yourselves to keep going during the Winter? How do you find the energy to do…well….life?
I have to force myself to do things. Which is one of the reasons I am babbling so much here. I’m hoping that just this act of writing will jumpstart something and I will find an energy source somehow.
Perhaps it is this platform? Perhaps I don’t enjoy the layout of this blog? Perhaps I need to go on some sort of web course?
I would really love to hear from any of you bloggers in my networks on how you tackle the Winter months and indeed how you keep it up throughout the year, something I fully intend to try to do this year. Again. Like every year.
Maybe I’m just not a blogger.